CULTURE

Reimagining Your Next 40 years - Why Midlife Is A Gift

Chip Conley has spent decades disrupting industries, from transforming the boutique hotel scene as the founder of Joie de Vivre Hospitality to leading Airbnb’s global hospitality revolution. Now, as the founder of the Modern Elder Academy (MEA) and the author of seven books, Chip is continuing with his mission of rebranding midlife. His latest book, Learning to Love Midlife: 12 Reasons Why Life Gets Better with Age, offers a fresh perspective on the often-overlooked stage of life that is associated with crisis or decline. In this interview, we explore how Chip’s experience as a ‘modern elder’ has shaped his vision for midlife, the wisdom he’s gained along the way, and how his ground-breaking work is helping people reimagine ageing for people of various ages - and disrupt some industries while he’s at it.
Chip Conley's books
You are a New York Times best selling author and the “proud father” of seven popular books - what inspired you to write Learning to Love Midlife, and why do you think this message is so critical at this moment?
As we’re living longer, midlife is stretching longer, but it’s a life stage that gets no respect. I believe midlife doesn’t have to be a crisis, but can be a chrysalis; a time of deep transformation when you let go of the first half of adulthood. Given the escalating midlife suicide rates, I think it’s essential that we help people see the upside of midlife and beyond. That’s why the subtitle of my book is “12 Reasons Why Life Gets Better With Age.”

"With 5,500 graduates from 50 countries and 58 regional chapters around the world, I’ve been able to witness the value of “long life learning”—how to help people create a life that’s as deep and meaningful as it is long. You get a deep sense of how midlifers perceive this life stage and what works and doesn't with respect to curating the second half of one's life."

You often talk about "midlife" being the start of a new chapter rather than a decline. How do you suggest people shift their mindset to embrace this perspective?

The U-curve of happiness research has shown that after a long, slow decline in life satisfaction that lasts from our early 20s till about 50, we get happier with each decade after that. Becca Levy from Yale has shown that when we shift our mindset on ageing in midlife from a negative to a positive, we gain 7.5 years of additional longevity which is more efficacious than stopping smoking or starting to exercise in midlife. But, there are very few “pro-ageing” messages out there in the world.

Chip Conley
In the book, you discuss the concept of “modern elders”. Could you expand on what that means and how midlifers can leverage their wisdom in today’s fast-changing world?
After a successful career pioneering the U.S. boutique hotel business as the founder and CEO of Joie de Vivre Hospitality for 24 years, I was asked by the young Airbnb founders to help take their small tech start-up and turn it into the most valuable hospitality company in the world. They called me their “modern elder”—someone as curious as they are wise—and we developed a great relationship in intergenerational collaboration with me being a Boomer and 95% of the company being Millennials. With five generations in the workplace for the first time, we have such an opportunity to match wise modern elders with brilliant young entrepreneurs. 

Could you tell us about the Modern Elder Academy you founded in 2018, and what role did it play in the writing and research for this book?
With two campuses - one in Baja, Mexico and the other in Santa Fe, New Mexico - and a variety of online programs, MEA is the world’s first midlife wisdom school dedicated to helping people in their 40s, 50s and 60s (although we’ve had people as young as 25 and as old as 91 join us) reimagine and repurpose themselves. With 5,500 graduates from 50 countries and 58 regional chapters around the world, I’ve been able to witness the value of “long life learning”—how to help people create a life that’s as deep and meaningful as it is long. You get a deep sense of how midlifers perceive this life stage and what works and doesn't with respect to curating the second half of one's life. But, it's not just about the surveys we give them, but—given that I'm facilitating about half of the 170 workshops we've curated to-date—I see up close and personally the specific stories and anecdotes of those who make the pilgrimage to join us for a workshop.

"The two industries we’re trying to disrupt with MEA are higher education (with our midlife wisdom schools) and retirement communities (with our residential regenerative communities). Both are ripe for disruption because they haven’t innovated all that much. We’ve worked closely with leaders from Yale, University of Chicago, Arizona State, and St. John’s College to help them rethink how they offer “long life learning” and we’re also helping senior community developers to see how they need to innovate to stay relevant. Ultimately, we're helping them to learn how vast the opportunity is to address "long life learning," not just educating people at the start of adulthood."

You have been a strong advocate for intergenerational relationships in both work and life through your books, the Modern Elder Academy, and the Generations Over Dinner project. Could you share your thoughts on the importance of intergenerational relationships and their role in shaping the future of an ageing world?
We have some vexing problems to solve so why try to solve it in the old way, with older people in charge? Why not think of life as an “intergenerational potluck” with each generation bringing to the table that which they do best. Young brains are fast and focused (fluid intelligence) while older brains are holistic and intuitive (crystalised intelligence) so combining both kinds of brains can create a team neuro-diversity that helps us arrive at better solutions. 

My book Wisdom@Work: The Making of a Modern Elder explores this concept in depth, as does Arthur Brooks' book From Strength to Strength. As we age, we learn to do a 4-wheel drive of the brain as it starts to shrink, which means that we can be logical and lyrical in the same sentence. It also means that we can think through the long-term implications of the decisions we make, which is a skill that is not nearly as developed when we're younger. BMW's research has shown that teams with primarily young workers make decisions faster and make more mistakes. Teams with primarily older workers take longer to make decisions but make fewer mistakes. Mixed-age teams offer the best of both worlds: they make decisions relatively quickly and make less mistakes.
You are revolutionising midlife with wisdom, positivity and inspiration - what are your future steps in making the world a little more age friendly?
The two industries we’re trying to disrupt with MEA are higher education (with our midlife wisdom schools) and retirement communities (with our residential regenerative communities). Both are ripe for disruption because they haven’t innovated all that much. We’ve worked closely with leaders from Yale, University of Chicago, Arizona State, and St. John’s College to help them rethink how they offer “long life learning” and we’re also helping senior community developers to see how they need to innovate to stay relevant. Ultimately, we're helping them to learn how vast the opportunity is to address "long life learning," not just educating people at the start of adulthood.

Our regenerative community is Baja Sage, a 26-home development we’ve created, built around a regenerative farm within walking distance of our Baja campus, and we'll be replicating this in Santa Fe. We believe that people want to live in an intentional community with others who want to constantly regenerate themselves and their communities.

The Modern Elder Academy (MEA), Baja Campus
Chip Conley is an American hotelier, hospitality entrepreneur, author and speaker. In 2018, he co-founded the Modern Elder Academy (MEA), the world’s first "midlife wisdom school” inspired by his experience of intergenerational mentoring as a ‘modern elder’ at Airbnb. A New York Times bestselling author, Conley's seventh book Learning to Love Midlife: 12 Reasons Why Life Gets Better with Age is about rebranding midlife to help people understand the upside of this often-misunderstood life stage and he was asked to give a 2023 TED talk on the "midlife chrysalis." 

If you want to hear more from Chip we recommend this talk and this one too.

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